December 16th, 2008
Last week the RCMP thoroughly investigated themselves and declared that the cause of a Polish immigrant’s death was most likely heart disease, fear of flying, tiredness and/or alcoholism, rather than being the result of the police officers tasering the man over and over again directly before his death. Building on this precedent, yesterday the RCMP declared there is not a “substantial body of independent evidence” that a recent stabbing death was caused by a knife. As the Crown spokesperson explained:
To the “lay person”, I’m sure it looks like a cut-and-dry case – a knife being plunged over and over into a person who’s life came to an end shortly there after. However, our exhaustive investigation over the last 3 hours indicates that the fear of being repeatedly stabbed that the “victim” experienced while the assailant approached him waving a knife sent him into an “agitated state of delirium”. It also appears that the “victim” got less than seven hours sleep the night before, and importantly the stabs were directed towards the liver area, which was likely impaired by the glass of Shiraz the recipient of the stabs had earlier in the day. In turn, the only fair conclusion is that while the stabbing may have been an unfortunate contributing factor to this tired, drunk and delirious gentleman’s untimely death, it is clearly falls short of the “substantial likelihood of conviction” threshold.
The spokeperson concluded her discussion by noting that to ensure this is a fair and just result, the Crown will demand that the accused undergoes a thorough investigation of himself over the coming weeks, in order to determine whether he thinks he is guilty of any wrongdoing.
3 responses
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On December 16th, 2008, Matthew Brett said:
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On February 24th, 2009, Police Association dares prosecutor to procure “even one” witness who has been killed by a taser said:
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On March 9th, 2009, RCMP launches 'staplers for giftcards' program, labels Staples a 'terrorist organization' | chTONGUEeek (tongue in cheek) said:
Leave a replyThanks for the link on Canadian Dimension’s blog. I’ll incorporate it into the piece. Nice site. Cheers
[...] Win free stuff TagsAmerica automakers bailout banks Barack Obama Bush Business California Canada Christmas Chrysler Clinton Coalition Comcast deflation depression Dion economy football GM Government Harper inauguration marketing nba Obama oil ontario Paulson pensions Politics porn poverty Pyramid Scheme RCMP Recession Russia Santa social media stocks Super Bowl transparency Twitter UAW unions Police Association dares prosecutor to procure “even one” witness who has been killed by a taser February 24th, 2009 In a novel defense that some analysts are saying has shades of the “if it doesn’t fit, you must acquit” miscarriage of justice legal precedent, the Police Association is defending their use of tasers by pointing out that the prosecutor cannot procure even a single witness who has actually been killed by a taser. They then went on to add that, by extension, all evidence that said tasers might be better understood as “death instruments” rather than “peaceful, bunny loving tools of awesomeness” – be it in the form of “witness” testimony, or widely available “YouTube” clips of, say, “people being killed by said tasers” – simply amounts to “hearsay”. For further reading on this controversial matter, please see “Stabbing death not caused by knife, RCMP says“. [...]
[...] March 9th, 2009 Editor’s Note: for background on this story, please see “Stabbing death not caused by knife, RCMP says“, and “Police Association dares prosecutor to procure ‘even one’ witness [...]